For The Queen, A Silver Tear

For the Queen, A Silver Tear

"Enter."


"Yes, M'lady."


"Oh, dear Cheralyn, you can dispense with the 'M'lady' crap. My daughters would have me be so formal with childhood friends, but there's nothing for it.


"Beg pardon, my Queen."


"Oh, geez, just STOP it already."


"Very sorry, your Majesty, daughter of Briana, Bringer of the Great Awareness and Leader of half the known galaxy."


"Oh, now you're just being difficult. Come, sit."


"I would, Your Royal Womanliness, but with all the medical equipment in here, it seems your doctors and nurses and whomever does your interior design work didn't leave any room for chairs."


"On the foot of the bed, silly girl. I'll not waste what's left of my voice shouting halfway across the room."


"If you will not allow me the honor of kissing your hand to show exactly how unworthy this one is of an audience...how 'bout a hug?"


"I'm sick, but not sick enough to come over there and kick your ass."


"I guess that means no hug, huh?"


"Oh, fuck you too, Cher...I was thinking more along the lines of an old-fashioned tongue tie..."


...ooooh, did THAT bring back memories!"


"Could you feel it?"


"What?"


"Your lips, your tongue, my tongue... Could you 'feel' it?"


"What a silly question."


"It's just that I...I can't really understand how...?"


"Tactile receptors, hardwired directly into the central nervous system of the body. Not really all that different from the 'old me' in that respect. Except...oh, so much MORE. If I wanted to, I could 'feel' the very air circulating around this room, tell you the exact temperature."


"That didn't exactly answer my question..."


"I don't understand..."


"Remember my sixteenth birthday? The old pond behind Mother's Servant's Quarters..."


"How could I possibly forget THAT?"


"I'm trying to remember your exact words. Something like feeling like the water filling your insides and outsides and still couldn't cool you down."


"Wow, Naomi, I've never felt like this before. I could jump in the water and not cool down."


"Was it like that? Could you FEEL it?"


"Oh...well...yes. It's still ME in here, Naomi..."


"You're breath was...cold."


"I can adjust that."


"But you didn't..."


"I'm...sorry. Really, it's only been a bit over a year for me and there's so much to get used to."


"That long? I'm so sorry it's taken so long to make room in my schedule..."


"I've always loved that about you, girl, you always knew when to steer the conversation..."


"No, really, I've missed you so much..."


"You run half the galaxy. I think..."


"Oh, stop it. I haven't had a real hand in affairs of state in over ten years. All of my decisions are made for me. I don't even get out of bed to pee without the approval of someone or another."


"Oh, Naomi, is it really THAT bad?"


"Oh, okay, I'm exaggerating. I can pee on my own."


"Hah. I'm serious. How bad is it? I feel bad I've been kind of lax in following the news."


"Well, politics being what it is, the family doesn't want to give out too much information about my exact condition."


"I understand. Don't sugarcoat it, girlfriend, I could always tell when you were lying, you know."


"Yeah, believe me, I know. I remember when you caught me sneaking out with that steward from Alpha Ten that Mother decided to keep around for her pleasure. What was his name again?"


"Phalatio."


"Oh, yeah. That name still makes me giggle. Nice to see the memories are still there."


"You have no idea. It never was nearly so easy before the procedure. No brain cells to lose, I guess. It's like having mental access to a supercomputer. The memories are in color, complete with smells, sounds and tastes. Here, see this small access port? It doubles as a projector. I can go so far as to actually project the memories, or any experience for that matter, so that anyone can share the visuals. Or if you really want, I can download it all onto a chip..."


"Oh, don't bother. The kid really wasn't all THAT good."


"Hahaha...I'm sure your mother thought so. What a hypocrite."


"It's a good thing SHE could never tell when I was lying."


"Yeah, she would have had me exiled so deep into manspace..."


"Goodness forbid, word should get back to the Council that the heir to the throne is swapping life juices with the crippled daughter of a dirty birth."


"She was quite the bigot, wasn't she?"


"Product of her generation, I suppose. Can't help but imagine what she'd say if she saw us together NOW."


"Hey, my body may be mostly metal now, but at least a 'Y' chromosome wasn't involved in the rebirthing process."


"Haha, you're probably right. The Vesnia may be green and scaly and smell like feces-crusted nasalapples but they don't have their brains hanging down from their groins..."


"Speaking of the Vesnia, how are the talks going?"


"So far so good, so far as I'm being kept informed. I'm not sure they can be trusted to maintain neutrality, but lure of the new technologies is hard for most of the Council and the system representatives to resist..."


"Well, if they need any witnesses with first hand experience..."


"I'll certainly keep that in mind. I have to admit that, even seeing you here with my own eyes, I still have a hard time believing that such a thing could be done safely."


"So could I, Naomi, but when you're faced with living the rest of what could be a long life..."


"Oh, Cher, I COMPLETELY understand. It wasn't so long ago that I don't remember. The cries in the night. In my arms. My shoulders. The tears on my breasts. In this day and age, it's simply inexcusable that such a condition can be allowed to exist, that a civilized people should turn a blind eye to it. No child should endure that kind of existence."


"Don't tear yourself up with this again, Naomi, please. You can only do so much..."


"But that's the dilemma the Vesnia now present us with. My leading researchers tell me that there's so much about this that we have no understanding of. To actually transfer the essence, the spirit, the memories, the soul..."


"I understand completely, but what more proof do you need? You can but recall those awful times. I LIVED them. I can relive them for you if you wish. I would not find any sort of pleasure in it, but I would gladly do it a thousand times over if it would convince you and the Council to spare future children the same suffering."


"No, Cher, I believe you. Really, I do. It's just that...well, it all seems a bit too..."


"Too what?"


"Let's just say that some of my closest and most trusted advisers have grave doubts."


"About what, exactly?"


"It's actually quite long and involved."


"I have time. I'm positively MADE of time. For the first time in my miserable life."


"Very well. How closely have you been keeping up with current political events?"


"Not too closely, I'll admit. Been too busy trying out the new body. Doing things I've thought about only in dreams."


"Hah, I bet. Anyway, are you aware of the recent problems in the Nadule system?"


"Coincidentally, yes. I was there a couple of months ago to test the limits of the machine body. Went bathing in the lava pools on the southern continent of Nadule."


"Then you know both the governor and assistant governor were assassinated within two days of each other."


"I know they both died, but I didn't know they were killed."


"Due to the political situation in the system, the Council decided it was...too sensitive to give out the exact details."


"Pardon?"


"The system is close to manspace and, as you know, the system decided a generation ago to remain integrated."


"Well, I'm not exactly one to tell them how to live, am I?"


"Absolutely. But there are some among the Council who think that the Vesnia may have had a hand in it."


"Really? How so?"


"As I said, it's long and fairly complicated. Let's just say that the assassinations there weren't an isolated incident. Both governors were female and very much opposed to integration. As were at least five other victims of similar assassinations across the outer systems of the Collective in the past four months."


"Sounds more like your typical 'Y' chromosome problem to me. Why suspect the Vesnia?"


"That's where it gets strange and why it isn't common knowledge at this point. As I mentioned, the lure of the new technologies is a strong one, so my staff has kept a tight fist on the flow of information about them as well as the news of the assassinations."


"And?"


"You noticed the security precautions when you came in, right?"


"How could I not? This place is a fortress. I doubt even a nuke could reach way down here."


"Exactly."


"Wait. You're not saying that they think YOU'RE a target?"


"Sadly, that's exactly what they fear."


"But why would the Vesnia...?"


"That's the question, isn't it? But the overwhelming intelligence we've collected points toward an assassin or assassins with bodies just like yours."


"No!"


"It's pretty convincing, Cher. Whoever or whatever killed Governor Hilton of the Maniba system survived countless rounds of high-caliber armor-piercing fire and hardly flinched. We have video evidence..."


"I don't believe it. In all of my dealings with the Vesnia, they've been extremely cordial. I just can't think that they had something to do with this. I won't!"


"I'd like to believe that too, Cher, but think of the threat. Almost perfect assassins. Or worse, an army of nearly indestructible soldiers..."


"Maybe it's simply an isolated incident?"


"We've ruled that out. The logistics support the idea of multiple killers. We even have seven more highly suspicious deaths that some of my intelligence officers think we ought to dump in with the others."


"But why would the Vesnia do something like that?"


"That's another good question. Some of my advisers think they're playing both ends against the middle and something similar is most likely happening in manspace. Maybe they're just using us as an experiment to see how the technology works? You know me, I'm not an expert in this kind of intrigue."


"So, I'm guessing that this whole thing is more than just swapping juices and exchanging old love stories."


"I'm sorry, Cher, but you have to understand I'm in a tough position here. When the director of intelligence passed to me the known list of essence transfers, your name naturally stuck out. Half of Mother's old staff knew of what we once had, how close we once were. Who knows how the information got used."


"Surely, you're not suggesting the only reason they picked me..."


"Honestly, I really have no idea. I just wanted...NEEDED to see for myself. If any of my staff knew about this meeting, they'd have stopped it cold."


"You know I'd never, EVER do anything to hurt you or the Collective. You KNOW it."


"That's just it, Cher, from what my researchers tell me, there might not be any way for you to prevent it."


"And what exactly is THAT supposed to mean?"


"I'm sorry, this has all gone totally wrong. Terribly wrong. I'd rather die myself than think you would betray me. Betray what we had."


"You haven't answered my question, Naomi."


"I'm not an expert, Cher. I can only go on what I've been told. On what I feel."


"And that is?"


"I'm a sentimental old fool, Cher. I'd like to believe my gut rather than my eyes."


"Just come right out and say it, Naomi."


"I...can't. Because I still don't know. Look, we don't completely understand the technology and there's no way to be sure WHAT goes on during an essence transfer."


"I'm...really not sure myself. What I've become. But I do know I'd rather die than go back to the...thing...that I was."


"Heh."


"What's so funny?"


"C'mon and lay down here next to me. Please? Thank you, Cher. I'm just thinking about the irony of our situation. Growing up, I was the one with all the dreams, with the future of the galaxy in front of me. Now, I'm stuck here in this bed, in this room, in this fortress, not knowing from one day to the next whether or not I'll see the sun again, much less the stars. But you..."


"Yeah, I suppose it is kind of twisted fate. I used to get sooooooo jealous. Not of the royalty thing. Not because of the sins of my parents. But because you could brush your OWN hair. Take a bath whenever you wanted without having to have someone else scrub your back."


"Hey, I thought you LOVED how I scrubbed your back and brushed your hair."


"Hehe, yeah. I guess I did too. But sometimes I take a bath now even though I don't need to. Just because."


"Hey, remember when we spent hours and hours in the study watching all those vids and reading all those books about the old Earth Queens and Kings of Egypt?"


"Do I? You always went on and on about how when you were Queen, you'd have all sorts of pyramids built in your honor."


"Yeah, too bad pyramids are so retro. Never could get the Council to authorize the funds. But I still think it would be really great to eventually be buried with all my stuff, all my pets...well, if I had any pets...and think about how generations and generations of women and kids would come visit and wonder who I was."


"Well, now that I think about it, this fortress kind of looks like a pyramid, doesn't it?"


"Hmm, never really thought about it much, but now that you mention it... Add a few stones here, few bricks there..."


"Kind of gloomy thought, though, isn't it?"NAOMI: "Well, we all have to die sometimes."


"Do we?"


"Hmm?"


"The essence transfer. Think about it. The only restrictions are on the availability of material for new bodies."


"Actually, I'd rather not. There's just something...eh...unnatural about it. But I can't say for certain I'm in the majority among the Council in that thinking. It's just that sort of thing that makes it so...inviting."


"And just what's so wrong with it?"


"I'm not much of a philosopher, but I can't help thinking what kind of society we'd evolve into if a select few gained eternal life. Would they still retain any kind of empathy for those who don't?"


"I have."


"Have you? And even if you do at the moment, what happens in a hundred years? A thousand? Ten thousand? If you never have to eat or drink to stay alive, do you have any compassion for those who are hungry or thirsty?"


"Hmm, I never really gave it much thought."


"Well, I think maybe we need to before we jump headfirst into that particular dirty pool of water. Of all people, you should remember what it's like to have people treat you according to your differences."


"You didn't."


"Well, I'd like to think I represent the overwhelming majority of humanity in that, but my experiences suggest otherwise."


"Well, anyway, if I'm any indication, humanity has absolutely nothing to worry about from the essence transfer process."


"Doesn't it?"


"Okay, Naomi, enough games. Just come right out and say whatever it is you've been dancing around ever since I got here."


"Can you cry?"


"Of course. Complete with water and salt."


"I want to see it."


"Oh, c'mon, silly, you KNOW it's not that easy."


"You used to cry all the time when we were growing up."


"I'm different now."


"Well, that's obvious. But just humor this pathetic old woman that you used to love. Please?"


"Again, it's just NOT that easy."


"Maybe it ought to be. Look at my eyes...Cher. I can do it."


"Oh, c'mon, Naomi, please...stop it."


"I can't, dammit. Can't you see...that's my whole POINT."


"Please...?"


"When we were growing up, every time I cried, you cried with me. EVERY time, Cher."


"Please...don't do this."


"That's what made us special, Cher. MAKES us special. Fucking tears. *sniff* I cried, you cried, hell, even Mother cried."


"Dammit, Naomi..."


"You can't do it now, can you?"


"Please...just stop."


"You said you could always tell when I was lying."


"Of course. My new ears can detect a change in heart rate and body temperature..."


"Fuck your new body, Cher. *sniff* I've been lying to you for the past half hour."


"What?"


"Yeah, that's right. The assassination thing. How sick I am. All lies."


"I don't...understand."


"There aren't multiple assassins, you were right about that. Only one. I guess it gave the Vesnia and whomever they're working with some kind of perverted satisfaction."


"Now just wait a minute..."


"I just had to see for myself, stupid, foolish old woman that I've become. You had absolutely no idea I was lying, did you?"


"I..."


"DID YOU?!"


"I've heard enough."


"Don't waste your time, Cher, the door is a meter thick and the walls are thicker."


"For the love of..."


"Love of what, Cher? Can you even feel...love?


"Stop it, Naomi, just stop it."


"My scientists say they don't completely understand how the Vesnia activate the remote, but they figure it has something to do with radiation of one sort or another. But since we're almost a mile underground..."


"You're talking crazy, Naomi. I'd never do ANYTHING to hurt..."


"I believe you, Cher, you know I do. *sniff* What I'm saying is that you don't really have a choice anymore. None of my researchers have any clue as to how to correct it."


"Damn it, Naomi..."


"Go ahead. Let it out, Cher. Beat on the walls. There's no one within a mile of us. I made sure of it. We have no way of even holding someone like you until we can find out how it works. And there's always the chance that the Vesnia will be able to bypass whatever we set up."


"You can't hold me here forever."


*sniff* "I'm Queen Naomi the Third of the Collective, Cher I love you dearly, but my heart belongs to my people."


"So, what next?"


"You want to watch the video?"


"Video?"


*sniff* "The one from the hidden camera in Governor Hilton's bath. Your eyes are black. They didn't tell you your beautiful blue eyes would turn black, did they?"


"My eyes aren't black."


"Your metal face is expressive now too. You want to see what it looked like when you crushed his skull like a ferronut?"


"I was in the Maniba system, but I never, NEVER went near the royal palace in the two days I was there."


"I'm sure that's what you believe, Cher. You want to see the video? I've got it all set up on the monitor over there."


"I...don't believe it."


"And after that, we can watch the assassination of Prime Minister Napole of Barcine. That one we've managed to keep under wraps."


"Barcine? I spent my three days there riding the Great Waves off the seashore of the northern continent."


"And last month on Cestas 5 when General Danna mysteriously fell to her death?"


"..."


"You said earlier that you'd rather die than go back to being that 'thing' that you were before. That "thing" was a beautiful, vibrant, absolutely adorable sliver of a girl that I loved with all my heart. A kind of love that does not fade with the years. A kind of love that can cause even royalty to turn a blind eye to the truth, a kind of love that...can cause the downfall of an empire."


"I don't understand..."


"I'm dying, Cher. Outside and inside. There's nothing that can be done about the body. But the other...the part that read the reports, watched the videos of all of your experiences of the past six months...that part faces a death of a far worse kind. Yes, I've known about the murders, seven at least and maybe many we might never learn of. I've KNOWN, Cher, known and watched and cried and could have given the order to have you brought here or...destroyed...any time in the past few months."


"But why?"


"Because underneath this royal skin, I'm still the same silly girl who fell in love with you all those years ago. Who am I to deny you, of all people, a few more months of joy after a cruel lifetime of pain and suffering and agony? How can I purge from my addled brain the years of horrible memories, the nightmares, the streams of tears that flowed from these big blue eyes I love so? I don't HAVE a metal body and a supercomputer for a brain, Cher. I can't turn the tears off and on with the flip of a switch. Every day my advisers would give me more evidence, every night I would lay awake crying and wonder to myself when the decision would be taken out of my hands, when one of my staff would go to the Council..."


"Oh, Naomi, no..."


"Off your knees, girl. The decision's been made. There's nothing more for it. You always were quite perceptive, in this your new body hasn't totally failed you. This IS a pyramid. A fortress built to keep a pair of tortured souls confined for all eternity. A tomb to the folly of a foolish old woman who very nearly let love destroy what countless generations of good women have lived and died to build. It was the least they could do to let me choose the moment and location of my passing. Our passing."


"I...will...not..."


"Ah, yes, I was warned this might happen. Poor Cher. A computer is still a computer after all. A program is a program. If there is any part of you still in there at the moment, I demand to see those blue eyes again..."


"This body is virtually indestructible and we are made of time."


"And I have a fairly powerful nuclear device built into the structure beneath this bed, ready to detonate whenever I feel the urge, or whenever my life signs cease. At the moment I really do not care which happens first. Now be a good program and give me my lover back."


"This is not over."


"It is for me. Now, please show us the common decency that my advisers tell me is one of the few values our species have in common and GIVE ME MY LOVER BACK!"


"Oh, Naomi, I..."


"Damn, girlfriend, I told you to get up off your knees. It's unbecoming."


"I...have no words..."


"I don't need words. I need you here beside me. I need to stare helplessly into those blue eyes. I need...what's wrong?"


"I'm so sorry, Naomi...it's like a damned flood. Overwhelming. Releasing everything at once. The screams. The deaths. The blood."


"Oh, poor Cher. Dear, sweet Cher. Would I could hug your mind clean...you're shaking like..."


"Every cry. I can hear every cry. Feel every drop of blood. Please...please...make it stop..."


"What's this? A silver tear, Cher. A gift fit for a Queen."


"Please! I can't...won't live like this...with this."


"I love you, Cheralyn."


*snif* "Please, Naomi?"


"Can you forgive a stupid old woman? This is all my fault. I could...should have acted sooner...maybe spared you a few..."


"PLEASE?"


"Sorry, Cher, but I'm afraid that there's probably only one way..."


"I understand. Oh, I'm so sorry, Naomi. I only wanted to live...like everyone else..."


"Shhh...you owe me nothing. If anything, the universe owes YOU another life...such a gentle soul."


"But now they'll...remember me...as a murderer and you..."


"Fuck all that, Cher. In ten thousand years, history will have been written and rewritten a hundred times. But this wondrous tomb will remain...who's to say what the universe will make of it?"


"I wish I could...we could...go back...if only I had hair and you had a brush."


"Or a bathtub."


"Or a pond."


"I could scrub your back."


"Oh, no my Queen, I shall scrub YOURS."


"I love you, Cher.