On Sarah Palin and the "great turkey carnage" video. I was kinda, sorta wondering what happened to "pardoned" turkeys...
I feel the need for a Children's Book - "Tom, the National Turkey."
Tom gets yanked from the cages with the rest of his buddies bound for the slaughterhouse. He gets the royal treatment, including his feathers buffed, gourmet turkey feed, etc. Pecks at the Presidential pet and is paraded around the Rose Garden in front of adoring children and numerous paparazzi for his ten minutes of fame.
Then gets carted off to the National Zoo where his turkey feed is somewhat downgraded, but there still are adoring children there to point and poke at him.
Then, weeks later, in the dead of night, someone throws a heavy burlap sack over poor Tom's National Turkey's head. He sits in a very dark place, not knowing his fate. But, hey, it's bigger than those cramped cages he grew up in. Not so bad, really.
Then the door to the truck opens and Tom runs out into the sunlight. Turns around and runs after the truck, but can't catch it. He's alone. Surrounded by...trees. Rocks. Dirt. No turkey food anywhere in sight. He tries to cry like he saw the adoring children do when their mommas grabbed them by the arms and yanked them away from his Zoo pen.
But he can't. Turkey's can't cry. Poor Tom.
Days go by and he tries competing with the pigeons and sparrows for seeds. But Tom has no idea where the seeds are. He's starving. In desperation, he tries to find his way back to the Zoo, finally stumbling onto a highway. Sees a truck coming and since he's only seen one truck in his life, he figures it's got to be coming for him. So he runs out into the middle of the road...
...and gets smacked back to the side of the road. Stumbling in his last moments, he thinks back to how all his childhood friends died to help those adoring children grow up fat and happy around Thanksgiving tables while he, Tom the National Turkey is dying slowly on the side of the road. Helping no one. Well, almost no one.
With his dying eyes, he looks up to see a flock of feathered friends swooping down towards him. Maybe, he thinks...maybe this isn't the end?
Right before the buzzards rip out his eyes and peel the flesh from beneath his National Feathers...
His last thought is how cruel this world is. You spend your life in a cage seperated by the vast majority of your peers, get picked from millions of others to spend a little time at the White House, then spend the rest of your miserable life getting your bones gnawed at by everyone and everything around you...
---oh wait, that's GWBush---
WZB
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Back to School
Heather? Don't answer out loud, that would get you in trouble and I don't want to get you in too much trouble. At least not yet. If I ask you to answer, just give me a "uh-huh" in that soft breathy voice. The kids will just think you're talking to yourself.
They're taking the test, now, right?
"Umhumm"
Great. Dont'cha just love these handless sets? You can just sit back behind your desk and no one hears a thing. Of course, we both know it's against school policy to use them while class is in session, but that's half the fun, isn't it?
Now, we're going to have a lot of fun during the next fifteen minutes or so, Heather. Fun with all the horny teens in your class. All those hormones.
Teenaged boys are just little animals, you know. Show them a picture of a naked women and get their underwear all messy. They spend all day in their little classrooms just waiting for a chance to see a creamy thigh or nipple slip. But, hey, that's what educators like you are for, Heather.
Now, you are wearing the purple dress, right?
"Uh-huh."
Excellent! Cut low, but not too low. I want you to "accidentally" roll a pencil or pen across your desk until it falls on the floor in front of your desk by the first row of chairs. Try and make sure it makes enough noise to bring some heads up off the tests. Will you do that for me?
"Ummhumm."
Now, you'll casually walk around your desk, making sure that you're facing the class...and bend down to pick it up. And, Heather, bend at the waist as much as you can...
Damn, I bet at least half a dozen high-school cocks shot up at just that moment, didn't they, Heather?
As I said before, it doesn't take much, you know.
Now turn back away from the class and stop in front of your desk to replace the pencil. You are wearing the thong, right?
"Uh-huh."
Kindly, nonchalantly, bend slightly over your desk and adjust your thong at the waist. Just to give extra credit for those paying attention.
Damn, that makes you wet, doesn't it, Heather? Knowing at least four or five hungry sets of eyes care more about you than they do a silly English test?
"Uh...?"
Oh, come on, Miss Wheatley, of course it does. It makes you positively nasty to know five or six kids under your charge are going to go home tonight and yank off because of you. It makes your nipples hard. Makes your face and chest turn beet red to imagine that, maybe even fifty years later, some kid from one of your classes is going to remember you. And it won't be because they got an A in English...
"Uh..."
Oh, that's fine. You don't have to realize that now. You'll have time enough later. What I want you to do now is much more fun. You are going to walk back around your desk and sit back down in your chair. Will you do that for me, Teacher?
"Uh-huh."
Excellent.
First, I want you to scan the classroom and tell me if any of your students seem much more interested in you than they do your class. And if they are, I want you to announce it quite loudly so that all the little ears hear it.
"Daniel, eyes on the test!"
Ah, quite nicely done, Miss Wheatley. I salute you. If nothing else, teens reject authority. That pretty much assures that even the studious will be wondering what the fuck is going on.
Oh, this is going to be quite precious.
What I want you to do, my little pet...I know your sweet little pussy is hot, but it's going to get much, much hotter. What I want you to do is to put both your hands down behind the desk where the little perverts can't see them. No, no, plenty of time to do it for real later...but what you will do right now is to make them think in their fertile little imaginations...yeah...fuck...that's right, Heather.
Sweat a little.
Slowly move your feet apart in case some especially perceptive little hard-cocked boy is glancing under your desk from the rear of class.
Fiddle with your desk knobs if you have to do something with your fingers. Moan a bit.
Under your breath, of course.
Close your eyes and imagine what it will be like when you finally get release. Picture in your mind what some of them will be thinking...that the subject of their nightly jack-off sessions is playing with her pussy right there in class! Prim, proper, Miss Heather Wheatley...moving her fingers in and out, teasing...
Makes you shudder inside, doesn't it? Maybe one of them has a phone camera focused on you, right now. Will come to you after class. Threaten to put it on the net...
That's right, makes your face turn red, doesn't it?
Good. Better to teach them what a real grown woman looks like as she gets ready to cum.
Give them a show they'll remember. See how many of them can pretend to be marking scan sheets when they're really scanning your lovely body for signs of things they can only dream of at this point in life. Hell, even some of the girls will remember this. Of course, they'll talk. You remember what it was like. You were secretly jealous back then, weren't you? You think times have changed that much? Ha! You'll be the hot topic in the cafeteria before the week is up.
But that very thought makes your toes curl until they hurt, doesn't it?
Speaking of your toes, I want you to slip your lovely, slippery nylon feet out of your pumps. One at a time. Rub your painted pretties against the wooden desk legs. Bring one hand up slowly to your mouth and lick a finger. Stretch your legs out under the desk. Slowly. Arch your back until the swivel chair makes a tell-tale noise no one in the class can ignore. Bump back against the blackboard if you have to get the attention of the A students.
And when you are finished...let me know.
You still there?
"Uh.....huh....ummm."
Excellent! If I know you, and I do, my imagination probably doesn't do you justice, Miss Wheatley. I bet mothers never even dreamed when they stuck their children with names like "Heather," that one day their kids would grow up to be true innovators...but that's beside the point. What you have painted in this fifteen minutes is a picture that every non-attention deficient student in your class will recall until...well, until they have masterpieces of their own to paint.
Maybe even after...
Now, my pet, you will do your best to pretend to...no, I imagine you will really have to compose yourself. Smooth out your dress. Rub your hands across you temples in a vain attempt to wipe away the color from your face.
Cough, softly, to eliminate that uncomfortable lump in your throat.
Even if you don't need to.
Excellent. Imagine all the underwear - and fragile psyches - you just messed up. Feels great, doesn't it?
Powerful.
Not exactly the kind of thing famous pupils will admit to publicly in future biographies and such, but we both know what horny teens really remember, don't we?
What I want you to do now is rise from your chair and swagger to the windows like a junkie who has had her ultimate fix...and...
"Uhhh....."
Turn your back to the class and...making sure your shadow is making a mark on the far wall...bend down slowly over the air-conditioning vents near the window...cool your sweaty neck and face, giving the little shits a really good view of your ample backside...
...then...
"Uhh...yeah...."
Take your hair down.
Slowly.
Carefully.
Let it fall in all its glory into the imaginations of every boy and girl in your sixth period class.
"...and...?"
Put it back up.
Wrap the beret around your fingers like the weapon that it is. Pick it up strand by strand. Twirl it when you feel you need to because all the girls in your classes are old enough to know the code...
...you're hot.
In a way they may never grow into. But secretly long to be...
Sexy.
Heaven sexy.
Heather sexy.
Teacher Heather sexy.
Sexy enough to be remembered in wet dreams long after any of the boys in your class recall the awkward blow jobs behind the Dairy Queen on Friday football nights.
Sexy enough to be remembered long after they marry their childhood sweeties and move out to the suburbs.
Oh, yeah, and when everyone comes up to you to hand you their test sheets, be sure to go out of your way to "accidentally" rub up against Daniel's butt when he gives you his scantron sheet...
Just because...
They're taking the test, now, right?
"Umhumm"
Great. Dont'cha just love these handless sets? You can just sit back behind your desk and no one hears a thing. Of course, we both know it's against school policy to use them while class is in session, but that's half the fun, isn't it?
Now, we're going to have a lot of fun during the next fifteen minutes or so, Heather. Fun with all the horny teens in your class. All those hormones.
Teenaged boys are just little animals, you know. Show them a picture of a naked women and get their underwear all messy. They spend all day in their little classrooms just waiting for a chance to see a creamy thigh or nipple slip. But, hey, that's what educators like you are for, Heather.
Now, you are wearing the purple dress, right?
"Uh-huh."
Excellent! Cut low, but not too low. I want you to "accidentally" roll a pencil or pen across your desk until it falls on the floor in front of your desk by the first row of chairs. Try and make sure it makes enough noise to bring some heads up off the tests. Will you do that for me?
"Ummhumm."
Now, you'll casually walk around your desk, making sure that you're facing the class...and bend down to pick it up. And, Heather, bend at the waist as much as you can...
Damn, I bet at least half a dozen high-school cocks shot up at just that moment, didn't they, Heather?
As I said before, it doesn't take much, you know.
Now turn back away from the class and stop in front of your desk to replace the pencil. You are wearing the thong, right?
"Uh-huh."
Kindly, nonchalantly, bend slightly over your desk and adjust your thong at the waist. Just to give extra credit for those paying attention.
Damn, that makes you wet, doesn't it, Heather? Knowing at least four or five hungry sets of eyes care more about you than they do a silly English test?
"Uh...?"
Oh, come on, Miss Wheatley, of course it does. It makes you positively nasty to know five or six kids under your charge are going to go home tonight and yank off because of you. It makes your nipples hard. Makes your face and chest turn beet red to imagine that, maybe even fifty years later, some kid from one of your classes is going to remember you. And it won't be because they got an A in English...
"Uh..."
Oh, that's fine. You don't have to realize that now. You'll have time enough later. What I want you to do now is much more fun. You are going to walk back around your desk and sit back down in your chair. Will you do that for me, Teacher?
"Uh-huh."
Excellent.
First, I want you to scan the classroom and tell me if any of your students seem much more interested in you than they do your class. And if they are, I want you to announce it quite loudly so that all the little ears hear it.
"Daniel, eyes on the test!"
Ah, quite nicely done, Miss Wheatley. I salute you. If nothing else, teens reject authority. That pretty much assures that even the studious will be wondering what the fuck is going on.
Oh, this is going to be quite precious.
What I want you to do, my little pet...I know your sweet little pussy is hot, but it's going to get much, much hotter. What I want you to do is to put both your hands down behind the desk where the little perverts can't see them. No, no, plenty of time to do it for real later...but what you will do right now is to make them think in their fertile little imaginations...yeah...fuck...that's right, Heather.
Sweat a little.
Slowly move your feet apart in case some especially perceptive little hard-cocked boy is glancing under your desk from the rear of class.
Fiddle with your desk knobs if you have to do something with your fingers. Moan a bit.
Under your breath, of course.
Close your eyes and imagine what it will be like when you finally get release. Picture in your mind what some of them will be thinking...that the subject of their nightly jack-off sessions is playing with her pussy right there in class! Prim, proper, Miss Heather Wheatley...moving her fingers in and out, teasing...
Makes you shudder inside, doesn't it? Maybe one of them has a phone camera focused on you, right now. Will come to you after class. Threaten to put it on the net...
That's right, makes your face turn red, doesn't it?
Good. Better to teach them what a real grown woman looks like as she gets ready to cum.
Give them a show they'll remember. See how many of them can pretend to be marking scan sheets when they're really scanning your lovely body for signs of things they can only dream of at this point in life. Hell, even some of the girls will remember this. Of course, they'll talk. You remember what it was like. You were secretly jealous back then, weren't you? You think times have changed that much? Ha! You'll be the hot topic in the cafeteria before the week is up.
But that very thought makes your toes curl until they hurt, doesn't it?
Speaking of your toes, I want you to slip your lovely, slippery nylon feet out of your pumps. One at a time. Rub your painted pretties against the wooden desk legs. Bring one hand up slowly to your mouth and lick a finger. Stretch your legs out under the desk. Slowly. Arch your back until the swivel chair makes a tell-tale noise no one in the class can ignore. Bump back against the blackboard if you have to get the attention of the A students.
And when you are finished...let me know.
You still there?
"Uh.....huh....ummm."
Excellent! If I know you, and I do, my imagination probably doesn't do you justice, Miss Wheatley. I bet mothers never even dreamed when they stuck their children with names like "Heather," that one day their kids would grow up to be true innovators...but that's beside the point. What you have painted in this fifteen minutes is a picture that every non-attention deficient student in your class will recall until...well, until they have masterpieces of their own to paint.
Maybe even after...
Now, my pet, you will do your best to pretend to...no, I imagine you will really have to compose yourself. Smooth out your dress. Rub your hands across you temples in a vain attempt to wipe away the color from your face.
Cough, softly, to eliminate that uncomfortable lump in your throat.
Even if you don't need to.
Excellent. Imagine all the underwear - and fragile psyches - you just messed up. Feels great, doesn't it?
Powerful.
Not exactly the kind of thing famous pupils will admit to publicly in future biographies and such, but we both know what horny teens really remember, don't we?
What I want you to do now is rise from your chair and swagger to the windows like a junkie who has had her ultimate fix...and...
"Uhhh....."
Turn your back to the class and...making sure your shadow is making a mark on the far wall...bend down slowly over the air-conditioning vents near the window...cool your sweaty neck and face, giving the little shits a really good view of your ample backside...
...then...
"Uhh...yeah...."
Take your hair down.
Slowly.
Carefully.
Let it fall in all its glory into the imaginations of every boy and girl in your sixth period class.
"...and...?"
Put it back up.
Wrap the beret around your fingers like the weapon that it is. Pick it up strand by strand. Twirl it when you feel you need to because all the girls in your classes are old enough to know the code...
...you're hot.
In a way they may never grow into. But secretly long to be...
Sexy.
Heaven sexy.
Heather sexy.
Teacher Heather sexy.
Sexy enough to be remembered in wet dreams long after any of the boys in your class recall the awkward blow jobs behind the Dairy Queen on Friday football nights.
Sexy enough to be remembered long after they marry their childhood sweeties and move out to the suburbs.
Oh, yeah, and when everyone comes up to you to hand you their test sheets, be sure to go out of your way to "accidentally" rub up against Daniel's butt when he gives you his scantron sheet...
Just because...
Saturday, October 18, 2008
An EMC Story Idea Just too Goofy to Pass Up
heh, if someone can write a story about a woman being mind-trained to think of giving a blow job as "cock cleaning," surely someone can use this one:
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/07/03/fashion/03SkinOne.html?_r=1&oref=slogin
The spa is essentially a gussied-up examination room down the hall from Dr. Romanzi’s medical practice. At the spa, the signature treatment will be a $150 gynecological exam — in which a client contracts her pelvic muscles around Dr. Romanzi’s fingers — to determine by feel whether muscle tone is weak, moderate or strong.Dr. Romanzi likes to call the vaginal workouts she prescribes “personal training.” Clients could also use an in-office electrostimulation machine to improve pelvic muscle tone or buy a device for home use. Dr. Romanzi said that such treatments are intended to improve bladder control; she said pelvic training may also lead to more intense orgasms.
"No, my dick isn't fucking you silly, my fingers aren't giving me a thrill, they're testing your 'pelvic muscle tone.'"
Seriously, you can't make this shit up.
Dr. Romanzi said her goal was to teach women how to properly perform Kegel exercises, intended to strengthen the sling-shaped muscle that supports the bladder, vagina and rectum. Gynecologists sometimes suggest such pelvic physiotherapy for minor vaginal laxity after childbirth or for mild urinary incontinence.
Hey, Dr. Romanzi, I got your "Kegal exercises" right here. But you gotta follow the swinging watch and unzip me first.
“If you can vote and you have a vagina, you should do these,” she said. “It’s the dental floss of feminine fitness.”
So's my cock, darlin'. It can work just like dental floss. Even cleans your teeth and gums.
There is good data to suggest if you floss regularly, it reduces gingivitis down the road,” said Dr. Erin E. Tracy, a gynecologist who is an assistant professor in obstetrics, gynecology and reproductive biology at the Harvard Medical School. But there is no evidence to suggest that a young woman who starts doing Kegel exercises will decrease her chances of pelvic problems later in life, she said.
Shhhh, damn you! Be quiet. OTOH, I guess every good EMC fuckfest needs an antagonist.
Dr. Romanzi said the pelvic fitness concept is based more on her clinical experience than on rigorous medical evidence. The spa will also offer cosmetic laser treatments intended to tighten the skin of the vulva in post-menopausal women.
Hey, my magic cum medication does the exact same thing! And it's cheaper! Free, even (well, okay, depending on how hot you happen to be).
“The common practice in gynecology is we treat where there is a problem,” Dr. Berenson said. “It’ll be interesting to see if there are people who actually request these services.”
Hell, give me a pocketwatch, swirling hypno-disc, subliminals in the waiting room or whatever and stand back!
---actually, I probably could write something, but I'd be laughing too hard to get through more than a couple pages ---
WZB
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/07/03/fashion/03SkinOne.html?_r=1&oref=slogin
The spa is essentially a gussied-up examination room down the hall from Dr. Romanzi’s medical practice. At the spa, the signature treatment will be a $150 gynecological exam — in which a client contracts her pelvic muscles around Dr. Romanzi’s fingers — to determine by feel whether muscle tone is weak, moderate or strong.Dr. Romanzi likes to call the vaginal workouts she prescribes “personal training.” Clients could also use an in-office electrostimulation machine to improve pelvic muscle tone or buy a device for home use. Dr. Romanzi said that such treatments are intended to improve bladder control; she said pelvic training may also lead to more intense orgasms.
"No, my dick isn't fucking you silly, my fingers aren't giving me a thrill, they're testing your 'pelvic muscle tone.'"
Seriously, you can't make this shit up.
Dr. Romanzi said her goal was to teach women how to properly perform Kegel exercises, intended to strengthen the sling-shaped muscle that supports the bladder, vagina and rectum. Gynecologists sometimes suggest such pelvic physiotherapy for minor vaginal laxity after childbirth or for mild urinary incontinence.
Hey, Dr. Romanzi, I got your "Kegal exercises" right here. But you gotta follow the swinging watch and unzip me first.
“If you can vote and you have a vagina, you should do these,” she said. “It’s the dental floss of feminine fitness.”
So's my cock, darlin'. It can work just like dental floss. Even cleans your teeth and gums.
There is good data to suggest if you floss regularly, it reduces gingivitis down the road,” said Dr. Erin E. Tracy, a gynecologist who is an assistant professor in obstetrics, gynecology and reproductive biology at the Harvard Medical School. But there is no evidence to suggest that a young woman who starts doing Kegel exercises will decrease her chances of pelvic problems later in life, she said.
Shhhh, damn you! Be quiet. OTOH, I guess every good EMC fuckfest needs an antagonist.
Dr. Romanzi said the pelvic fitness concept is based more on her clinical experience than on rigorous medical evidence. The spa will also offer cosmetic laser treatments intended to tighten the skin of the vulva in post-menopausal women.
Hey, my magic cum medication does the exact same thing! And it's cheaper! Free, even (well, okay, depending on how hot you happen to be).
“The common practice in gynecology is we treat where there is a problem,” Dr. Berenson said. “It’ll be interesting to see if there are people who actually request these services.”
Hell, give me a pocketwatch, swirling hypno-disc, subliminals in the waiting room or whatever and stand back!
---actually, I probably could write something, but I'd be laughing too hard to get through more than a couple pages ---
WZB
Radio Ad We're Not Likely To Hear Anytime Soon
Bud Light Presents Real Men of Genius
Real Men of Genius
Today we salute you, Mr. Erotic Mind Control Story Writer Guy
Mr Erotic Mind Control Story Writer Guy
Armed with a perverted prepubescent fascination gleaned from comic books, cartoons and cheesy horror films, you set out each day bound and determined to find imaginative ways to turn unwilling women into zombie sex dolls.
Love those swirly eyeballs
Be it through the magical plot devices of nanotech, telepathy, magic, drugs or just plain old hypnosis, you diligently labor over the keyboard, hoping to produce something that will make thousands of like-minded Internet readers reach for the Kleenex.
Where are my paper towels?
While most men your age spend their Sundays watching NASCAR or the NFL, you sit in front of your computer hitting the CNT/refresh key at mcstories.com, dreaming of how the rest of the world will view your latest masterpiece.
Hope Simon got my story.
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, oh Perverse Practitioner of the Pivoting Pocket watch, because if there's one thing the world really needs, it's another badly edited fantasy about a teenaged high school boy finding a magic ring and fucking every female in five zip codes.
Mr Erotic Mind Control Story Writer Guy
Monday, October 13, 2008
Links, Links, Links...
http://www.mcstories.com/index.html
The best porn archive site on the entire net run by a guy named after a cartoon character.
http://www.mcstories.com/Authors/Writerzblocked.html
Best author on said site, though the guy writing this particular blog admits to a certain bias.
http://www.mcstories.com/Authors/EyeofSerpent.html
Best author on said site not admitting to gender. Caution - should be advised, he/she bites. Hard. If not published and making millions of dollars under another nym, he/she needs to be.
http://www.asstr.org/~EyeofSerpent/
Personal website of author linked above. Should probably be read before any of his/her stories because it contains a pretty good order in which you should read them to avoid confusion. Website also contains about the best definition of EMC (Erotic Mind Control) that you are likely to find without Googling for hours and hours.
http://www.mcstories.com/Authors/Downing-Street.html
Personal favorite author of EMC. Legend in the sub-genre, which is pretty much the same thing as saying Tetsuo Hara is a legend in the sub-genre of kung-fu manga. Well, okay, DS writes in a language that more people read. Happy Googling.
http://www.mcforum.net/
Best message board devoted to EMC run by a guy who looks like a bag of fries and a woman who coined the term "pornashborge." Or "pornasboarge." Or something like that. Currently (as of this writing) under extreme pressure to boot out obnoxious writers who can't stop insulting other users on the political part of the board. Not their fault, they really are trying their best.
http://www.mcgarden.org/forum/
Best message board devoted to EMC run by lesbians. But, hey, message boards are run by the people actually willing to do the grunt work for free. Besides, most of the best EMC porn continues to be written by lesbians...
http://pajamasmedia.com/instapundit/
The grandfather of all viral websites.
---just because I thought I needed to slip one political website in before I pass out---
WZB
The best porn archive site on the entire net run by a guy named after a cartoon character.
http://www.mcstories.com/Authors/Writerzblocked.html
Best author on said site, though the guy writing this particular blog admits to a certain bias.
http://www.mcstories.com/Authors/EyeofSerpent.html
Best author on said site not admitting to gender. Caution - should be advised, he/she bites. Hard. If not published and making millions of dollars under another nym, he/she needs to be.
http://www.asstr.org/~EyeofSerpent/
Personal website of author linked above. Should probably be read before any of his/her stories because it contains a pretty good order in which you should read them to avoid confusion. Website also contains about the best definition of EMC (Erotic Mind Control) that you are likely to find without Googling for hours and hours.
http://www.mcstories.com/Authors/Downing-Street.html
Personal favorite author of EMC. Legend in the sub-genre, which is pretty much the same thing as saying Tetsuo Hara is a legend in the sub-genre of kung-fu manga. Well, okay, DS writes in a language that more people read. Happy Googling.
http://www.mcforum.net/
Best message board devoted to EMC run by a guy who looks like a bag of fries and a woman who coined the term "pornashborge." Or "pornasboarge." Or something like that. Currently (as of this writing) under extreme pressure to boot out obnoxious writers who can't stop insulting other users on the political part of the board. Not their fault, they really are trying their best.
http://www.mcgarden.org/forum/
Best message board devoted to EMC run by lesbians. But, hey, message boards are run by the people actually willing to do the grunt work for free. Besides, most of the best EMC porn continues to be written by lesbians...
http://pajamasmedia.com/instapundit/
The grandfather of all viral websites.
---just because I thought I needed to slip one political website in before I pass out---
WZB
WriterzBlog Take #1
Hmm...where to start?
An hour ago when I thought I got booted from MCForum?
A couple months ago when I discovered that this particular election cycle was probably the most important one in my life?
A year ago when I came to the conclusion that talking politics and culture was probably just as interesting to me as writing porn?
A couple of years ago when I decided that posting to MCForum was more interesting to me than posting to ASSD?
Almost ten years ago when I found that writing EMC porn was as appealing to me as talking about and reading EMC porn?
About fifteen years ago when I found that reading porn was a somewhat reasonable alternative to a failed marriage?
Twenty years ago when I discovered porn on the 'net?
Twenty five years ago when I discovered porn was a somewhat reasonable alternative to the fact that I couldn't understand women?
Twenty-eight years ago when I cast my first vote for POTUS because, damn it, Jimmy Carter just made my stomach churn?
Thirty-some-odd years ago when I found that pulling on my penis made me extremely happy?
All of the above?
---well, yeah, that question pretty much answered itself---
WZB
An hour ago when I thought I got booted from MCForum?
A couple months ago when I discovered that this particular election cycle was probably the most important one in my life?
A year ago when I came to the conclusion that talking politics and culture was probably just as interesting to me as writing porn?
A couple of years ago when I decided that posting to MCForum was more interesting to me than posting to ASSD?
Almost ten years ago when I found that writing EMC porn was as appealing to me as talking about and reading EMC porn?
About fifteen years ago when I found that reading porn was a somewhat reasonable alternative to a failed marriage?
Twenty years ago when I discovered porn on the 'net?
Twenty five years ago when I discovered porn was a somewhat reasonable alternative to the fact that I couldn't understand women?
Twenty-eight years ago when I cast my first vote for POTUS because, damn it, Jimmy Carter just made my stomach churn?
Thirty-some-odd years ago when I found that pulling on my penis made me extremely happy?
All of the above?
---well, yeah, that question pretty much answered itself---
WZB
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